jovonie mclendon jr livestream suicide

Army veternan, Jovonie McClendon Jr. suffering from PTSD shoots self on Facebook live after murdering girlfriend’s five year old son and critically wounding the boy’s mother.

More info here:

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6666195/PTSD-suffering-veteran-33-shoots-head-Facebook-live.html


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"i love y'all all" this man somehow managed to fuck up his last words

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damn... I researched what PTSD means, and so, I suffered a lot of psychological and physical torture by my family from my childhood until I was 21 years old or so. Until I was 17 it was aggression (and it wasn't simple aggression I suffered all these years...) and until I was 21 it was psychological torture or blackmail. I carry many traumas nowadays, sadness, anger... today I am 22 years old and I am undergoing psychiatric treatment. I am diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder, I take a very large dose of medication and even then I don't get better... memories keep coming in my mind, events, moments when my family stole from me too, etc. and many times I cannot live in peace. when I read about PTSD, I saw the video and understood why this guy killed himself. It's an immense torture what you live because of trauma. Depression is not the biggest one, but it is one of the worst along with anxiety. Schizophrenia is the worst there is, because even with high doses of medication you still have a distrust of people, you still feel fear, despair, sometimes I feel pain in the body (psychological) because of the aggressions. And to make it worse, I still hear voices that sometimes say several bad things. I suffered so much injustice that as I grew up I began to grow a lot in my sense of justice and judgment, to the point where I became insensitive to certain cases, and very sensitive to others. There have been episodes where I woke up with a knife in the middle of the night, because I thought I heard some noise inside my house. sometimes I saw shadows and thought she wanted to torture me... it was like that for many years, seeing things that were also distorted and that moved by themselves (these last ones are like this until today), I've had crises that I lost consciousness and kept alternating between conscious and unconscious several times, there were moments when I tried to kill myself, I tried to kill my family (because they were the cause of everything and for a long time I sought revenge), I hit my girlfriend because she tried to help me and so on. Today the medicine makes me more controlled, but sometimes it gets out of control. but I'm leading a much better life today than I did all these years. Today I can wake up, hug my girlfriend, say I love her, at least smile a few times a day, because before I couldn't... that's it. I don't really know what to say about how I feel. The only thing I can say is that this guy in the video wasn't a coward for doing this, he was just trying to escape the pain, and I know what that pain is... I don't wish this on even the worst person in the world

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I understand where you are coming from, I got diagnosed with Paranoid Schizophrenia two years ago when I was still in highschool. I used to tape my windows shut and stay in my room for weeks at a time. I used to hallucinate (what I thought was) the face of god decend from my ceiling and telling me to kill myself and my family to fuffil my purpose. At one point I couldn't tell reality from what I thought was hell. I was commited to the mental hospital after trying to kill myself. I was in Residental Care for around two months recovering from my psychotic episode. I'm much better now and properly medicated. I feel bad for this man because I know how mental illness can make people crack inside until they shatter, and sometimes no one will listen. This guy probably got told to "use coping mechanisms" or some shit instead of being told that everything was truely going to be okay. Sometimes all it takes to heal is the comfort of others who you know that love you.

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damn friend, what a thing! I usually say that if we have this disease for a long time and it takes time to treat it, it will learn how our daily lives are, how we deal with people, all in a silent way, without us even realizing it. it takes our weaknesses and uses them to its advantage... I usually say that this disease is a second life inside our mind and body, because it is very intelligent, but for evil. And as time goes on, it starts to take root in your mind. Gradually, each year or each month or each day that passes, it creates an alternative reality inside our mind that makes us think that the world is the way it created it in our mind. only the people around us notice something wrong. in my case, my family noticed it from my childhood, and even then they neglected me a lot. were racist to me and a lot of other things. I only found out that I had a problem and that it needed to be tackled in 2019, when I met my girlfriend. and it was she who told me that I had a serious problem and that I needed to be treated. she only recognized it because she has depression and borderline, she has already had other treatments, so she understood me right away. my family didn't like her helping me, they tried to separate us, and there were moments that (as I said above) I tried to kill myself. and when my family stopped me, I tried to kill them when I went to drug dealers trying to get a gun. It was one of the worst times for me. I think that, when the problem has been with you for years, it starts to eat your mind little by little, because it starts to settle in and adapt. he gradually degenerates his mind. the medicines only serve to make him stop trying to degenerate the parts that are still well, so you can live well for at least 60% 50% 40% that's left over from everything that happened. while the rest of the percentage will keep the problem isolated and he won't have a chance to get out of there and blow his mind anymore because of the drugs.

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yo let me buy some of your meds of you my good sir

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oh, I really wanted to sell some to you my noble, or even do an act of charity, but I have the correct amount of medicine for 1 month

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I understand everything (at least I can tell) how much you've suffered over the years. I, too, am similar to you in my 20s, depressed but unruly and clearly undiagnosed. I'm so glad you've finally gone through that rough time and someone who cares about you.

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does his mouth move as if he's talking after he shot himself or am i just seeing things:marseywut2:

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Oh shit

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Why diddnt he just fucking kill himself, or kill someone worthwhile?

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Rest in peace big brother. I love u for ever. Dude ur lil sister. Im still hurt by this.

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This fucking sucks, Hope he is a better place now

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This video is about a minute too long

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He messed up aluakbur

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